I found some letters in a box with memories of my mom

In the letters she describes her joy of mothering

At the time she lived in one room behind the church

Where Byron had his giggles and Ruthie had her curls

The weather cold and lots of snow up in Fort St John

Daddy teaching school a hundred miles from our home

My sister was the oldest and she wrote these stories down

The times she had with momma 

I’ll sing them to you now

One day while driving in the car  we got stuck in the mud

We all got out and had to walk a mile through the muck

At home all warm and dry she made hot milk with toast

It was our favorite treat to eat we all loved it the most

One day she started singing when she saw Robert and Lloyd

Their faces in the window watching her hang the clothes outside

How much is the doggie in the window she would sing

The feeling I remember and the warmth that it would bring

I got a new bicycle when, we lived in  Prince George

Her laughter was contagious as she rode it round the yard

She always made me feel good even when I’d cry

She had a way of kissing make the pain just go away 

When I was a little girl I would waken in the night

I saw my momma praying radiant in the candle light

With tears on her face her hands open in the air

Singing sweet to Jesus kneeling at the kitchen chair

She often sang at church I’d have a stirring in my soul

She prayed the Lord would heal her but was content to go

She beckoned me come near her just before she died

Jesus loves you Ruthie she said 

I was standing by her side

I memorized the Lord’s prayer sitting on my mothers knee

Our father in heaven hallowed be your name

Her voice so gentle I recall the radiance on her face

Now singing sweet to Jesus with all of heavens saints

a song by Bob and Maureen Clark

“Ten Second Poem But Just Right” by Maureen Clark

I wished

How I wished

For something

Beautiful

To come of this

Doesn’t make it  happen

Or so

But still

Better to wish

Than not

Better to hope

Than stop

Then what?

Then what?

Than nothing

We got tall buildings but shorter tempers, 

Wide Freeways,  narrow viewpoints. 

We spend more money, but got less real things

We got bigger houses but have smaller families, 

More conveniences, but less time with them

We have more degrees but less common senses

Got more knowledge, but less judgment

We think we’re experts, yet have more problems

Take more drugs, but feel more badness. 

We spend too reckless, laugh too little, 

Drive too fast, let anger control us

Stay up too late, get up too tired, 

Read too little, watch to much TV, 

We don’t listen but talk too easy

Make a good living, but not a good life. 

We’ve added more years  then we die to crabby. 

Been to the moon and back, conquered outer space 

We’ve done large things, but have so little peace. 

We’ve cleaned up the air,  but polluted our minds. 

We’ve conquered the atom, but forget to be kind

We plan more, accomplish less, always in a rush,

Can’t even wait for just one late bus

Build more computers to hold more stuff

Always complaining that we don’t have enough

Steep profits but shallow relationships. 

We worry more   but pray much less

Two incomes  but more break ups

Can’t understand I think I need to give up

These are days of quick trips, and fornicate

Lay lady lay  and throwaway babies 

We need a solution  we need a  answer

Someone told me I’d find it in scripture

Spend some time with the ones you love

Say a kind word    give a warm hug

Do a kind thing for someone in need

Say, ‘I love you’ and do a kind deed

Life isn’t measured by the breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

I saw you coming down the road away

Your clothes askew and it’s the middle of the day

Your body language says that you don’t care

If I was waiting here or anywhere

Am I a fool Am I a fool 

To think that you’ll be true

Think I’m a loser well think again

If there’s a loser then count me in

Feels like I suffer from an actual wound

The hurt gets deeper every time you move

Am I a fool Am I a fool 

Cause I’m still wanting you

I loved you more than once I got to say

It’s killing me each time that you don’t stay

Can’t get you off my mind I’m not sleeping

Got to admit you’re driving me insane

Am I a fool Am I a fool 

I’m still loving with you

Am I a fool Am I a fool 

Am I a fool Am I a fool

Ah hell I still love you

[URIS id=3305]

Best Friend I Ever Had

He spoke in a soft and quiet voice

And then he’d listened for a while

I’d want to hear his gentle words

I’d want to feel his tender smile

Folks around town  called him Mr.

He would greet everyone with a big “hello” 

Then he’d asked  “how you doing”

They would feel compelled to tell him so

He was a simple kind of man

He’d reach out take my  hand

He’d lead me straight to Jesus

He was, 

Best Friend I Ever Had

I could tell him all my problems

His eyes would smile when he bent down

He would always stop what he was doing

I  knew he’d understand

He had a garden out back home

On knees I’d see him pulling weeds

Then he’d take a bag of produce

He’d always find someone in need

God groans with us, is with us in suffering and meets us in this place. The stripping away of our security or what we think faith to be in the easy, forces us to have a new understanding of joy and peace within trial and testing. I think it’s comforting to know that we have a God that isn’t above our sorrow. He’s with us in it and feels it even more deeply than we do. He doesn’t expect us to have answers or to defend His sovereignty in this. He just asks us to abide in Him. I’ve seen it practiced in our house church. There’s so much encouragement in abiding, listening and communing together the way we have been. Love you all so much.

by Eva Buttrell spring 2020